Re: [DMCForum] Re: OK, now I am going to get my ass KICKED!
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Re: [DMCForum] Re: OK, now I am going to get my ass KICKED!



Robert,

You raise some interesting questions and philosophies about raising
kids.    It is ironic that with a written history going back some 5000
years, mankind still has not figured out how to raise good kids.

in my experience, there are both genetic and social reasons.

Having worked counciling hundreds of young teenage people and having
taught hundreds more at the college you find out quite of bit of
information of how parents screw up their kids.   The first thing is
that most parent simply had kids either by accident or be it was the
current thing to do- because all their friend were  having kids.  It
gave them something similar to talk about..

Virtually NONE of these parent ever studied child rearing or the
psychology of young people and young minds.
Worst yet, we as a society choose to PURPOSEFULLY NOT educate people on
how to communicate with young people.

Many people  still use the same techniques they use with animals, 
painful punishment to control their kids.  All that does is result in
worse behavior which has been passed on from generation to generation.

It is interesting that with positive training of animals we have been
able to communicate with them and they respond by doing task which we
humans want.    The elephants in Thailand actually seem to enjoy
helping people move lumber.

Reasoning with children right from the start - rather than beating on
them- is the right way to raise kids.  Sure they do not understand many
of the concepts and yes their behavior may not change as fast as lazy
parent want it too, but in the long run, reasoning of want behavior is
more desirable will produce a better adult.     It find it interesting
that as more and more parent today have less and less time to spend
raising their kids, we see many more young adults with behavior
problems.

The worst examples I have seen is of rich people who ignore their kids
and have them raised (fed) by nanies who barely speak english.  These
kids are wild,  they have no valve of family, and think nothing or care
nothing about other people.  All they ever want is money- because money
bought them toys which is the only positive thing they  have ever
experience.

Hence, when they enter society their only goal is money and they have
no cares about other people and their families.  Hence, they idle
executive.   They send these kids to schools which reinforce this anti
social behavior and greed for money.

The studies of abusive parents clearly show a relationship of abuse
behavior passed from generation to generation.  Until the cycle broken,
the behavior continues.   Why do we not teach children about this
problem from an early age?

The most interesting aspect of raising children is how much of their
behavior is pre programmed genetics.   Comparisons of habits between
parents (when they were children) and their own children are
interesting reading.   It clearly shows that eugenics may actually have
been a smart idea.

Anyways,  it still is unbelievable after thousands of years, we still
do not know have to raise good children.
Bob






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